thankful thursday: god’s plans

Have you ever thought about where you are today? What if you made one decision differently, how would it have changed your life?

When I was a senior in high school, I wanted to go to college “E”. It was in a bigger city, and I really thought I would like being there. I sent in applications to two schools, “E” and “W”. I really wanted to go to “E”, and didn’t care much for “W”. It turns out I got scholarship money to “W”, but not to “E”. I pouted and whined and said I didn’t care how much it cost, come heck or high water, I still wanted to go to “E”.

But “W” was the more logical choice: more affordable, good school, and it had the degree I was interested in. Don’t you hate the logical choice? I prayed. I felt God leading me to “W”. No matter how hard I pushed away from it, “W” seemed like the route I should go. So off to “W” I went. I met this big-haired surfer-boy at orientation. Five years later, I became his wife. And a year and a half later, we had our son.

A little over 3 years ago, I was in grad school (at “E”, coincidentally) and I landed my dream internship. Literally, since I was a wee one, I said I wanted to work for this organization. So in the summer of ’08, I loaded up and moved 5 hours away for a couple of months. It was like sending one of the Clampetts to the big city. I’d never seen that much pavement and concrete in my life. It was a major learning experience for me, and it was a really incredible internship. Before I left, I interviewed for 3 different jobs at the organization. I would have taken any one of them, but interview # 3 was for my dream job. It was a total long shot. I’d be working in Washington, D.C, the pay was great, benefits were exceptional, and my opportunities would be limitless. On the last day of the internship, I got the call that I had gotten the job from interview # 3. On paper, it looked great. It was my dream job, afterall. I prayed. God had other plans for me. And then I turned it down.

I thought about that one day last week. It was 7 a.m., and the sun was rising and peeking through our curtains. Ben was still snoring, and PB was sleeping sweetly in his room. I got up and walked out on the front porch. It was chilly. The leaves were starting to turn colors. It was so quiet. I looked around and saw mountains, cows, tractors, and wild, open land. My papaw was on a tractor. My dogs were just coming back up the hill from their morning hunt. Someone had a fire going. The air smelled like fall. Good, crisp, clean air.

And in that moment, I teared up. I was overwhelmed with gratitude. And shame. I thanked God for His plans for my life. And prayed for forgiveness for my lack of faith. Sometimes, I haven’t agreed with His plans initially. I resist and fight against His will for me. But in the long run, it all works out perfectly. I think about what I would have missed if I’d resisted His plans for college. There would be no big-haired surfer boy sleeping next to me, and no sweet little PB in the room next to us. I can’t imagine my life without them. And then I think about what it would be like waking up in the big city. No mountains, cows, tractors, or wild, open land. I would miss the peace and quiet. I would miss the country. It’s such a big part of me.

In the midst of decisions, I have a tendency to have a lack of faith in God’s plans. Sometimes, they sound downright crazy to me (turn down a great job to move back home with no job), and other times I resist because its not something “I” want. Yet when I’m standing on my little old front porch, in the middle of the country, surrounded by the family that I love, I know that His plan is always perfect. Every path that God has directed me on has led me to this life that I live. And love.

‘For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’. (Jeremiah 29:11).

Have a blessed Thursday 🙂

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3 thoughts on “thankful thursday: god’s plans

  1. So, so beautiful Britt! I am struggling so much with faith and God's plans for me right now. Thank you so much for your persistent displays of faith, you don't know who you are helping out there!!

    Like

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